|
Post by ozark on Jan 14, 2012 19:57:36 GMT -5
I am collecting comments related to people like me who are a bit behind the crowd. Often they are related to a trade, Like: "He is about a half bubble out of plumb, His elevator doesn't go all the way to the top, He must have rode the short bus to school, etc. Any would be appreciated. Hopefully, we will see some new ones. Ben
|
|
|
Post by wilmsmeyer on Jan 14, 2012 20:02:57 GMT -5
busier the a one legged man in an ass kickin tournament.....
|
|
|
Post by rrb55 on Jan 14, 2012 20:23:15 GMT -5
... looks like he was ridden hard and put away wet.
|
|
|
Post by ozark on Jan 14, 2012 20:26:35 GMT -5
Some others I have heard: One fry short of a happy meal, one brick short of a full load and my wifes favorite: The butter has all slid off his biscuit.
|
|
|
Post by Richard on Jan 14, 2012 20:29:56 GMT -5
"Your a day late and a dollar short!".............."He is not dipping both oars in the water!" "His lights are on, but no one is home?" "Put your brain in gear before your mouth gets moving" Richard
|
|
|
Post by rrb55 on Jan 14, 2012 20:32:29 GMT -5
...often recognizes right answer when told.
|
|
|
Post by dannoboone on Jan 14, 2012 22:38:45 GMT -5
... looks like he was ridden hard and put away wet. Have always heard that one using the other gender.
|
|
|
Post by redspinner3 on Jan 15, 2012 0:35:14 GMT -5
Up s##t creek leaky boat no paddle.
|
|
|
Post by cfvickers on Jan 15, 2012 0:50:23 GMT -5
Master of the Obvious.
|
|
|
Post by cfvickers on Jan 15, 2012 0:51:07 GMT -5
Stuck on stupid.
|
|
|
Post by cfvickers on Jan 15, 2012 0:51:31 GMT -5
Missing on one cylinder. I'll just start modifying, those came to me just as I posted the ones before. I went to dallas to see a buddy in 2002 and kept hearing everyone I met talk about terorists all over town. Had me scared to death till I figured out that they just meant cabby. I was in the military, I heard about terrorists and wanted to arm myself.
|
|
|
Post by wilmsmeyer on Jan 15, 2012 7:17:07 GMT -5
He's more useless then tits on a boar hog....
|
|
|
Post by dans on Jan 15, 2012 7:25:55 GMT -5
Meaner than a peach orchard boar. Oh and my Dads favorite, Couldnt hit a bull in the a-- with a shovel.
|
|
|
Post by cfvickers on Jan 15, 2012 8:08:58 GMT -5
Dans I always heard "Couldn't hit a bull in the A-- with a base fiddle"
|
|
|
Post by tar12 on Jan 15, 2012 8:17:33 GMT -5
Not the sharpest tool in the shed Not playing with a full deck Dumber than a box of rocks If he had a brain he would take it out and play with it
|
|
|
Post by DHinMN on Jan 15, 2012 9:38:44 GMT -5
"ya can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear." Heard that from my dad when I was a kid.
|
|
|
Post by cowpie on Jan 15, 2012 10:07:02 GMT -5
He's as sharp as a bowling ball / dumb as a box of hammers
|
|
|
Post by 12ptdroptine on Jan 15, 2012 10:43:35 GMT -5
I heard this one once...always stuck with me. " Must be your a$$ talking cause your head knows better"
|
|
|
Post by billc on Jan 15, 2012 11:13:20 GMT -5
Double parked in the twilight zone
Your A$$ must be jealous because of all the crap coming out of your mouth.
Shining like a diamond in a goat's A$$
|
|
|
Post by ozark on Jan 15, 2012 11:27:48 GMT -5
"If his brain was dynamite there wouldn't be enough to blow his nose."
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jan 15, 2012 12:55:16 GMT -5
He's a few cards short of a FULL deck......... My surgeon doctor had one, he is passed now, but when I came to him with half of my cut finger hanging and smashed... I asked him can you put it back together? He told me " We can make chicken salad out of chicken poop....." I am glad he put it back on ,God Bless Ian Rogers .....
|
|
|
Post by youp50 on Jan 15, 2012 13:40:35 GMT -5
I feel finer than frog's hair split four ways. And on the other side of life...sucking hind teat on a boar hog.
|
|
|
Post by cfvickers on Jan 15, 2012 14:53:18 GMT -5
He opens his mouth and (Insert profane word for manure) spews forth
|
|
|
Post by petev on Jan 15, 2012 16:04:36 GMT -5
Busy as a one armed paper hanger. Concerning saws- couldn't cut a stick of butter on the Fourth of July.
|
|
|
Post by gunny on Jan 15, 2012 16:40:56 GMT -5
Dummer than a box of rocks ;D
|
|
|
Post by gunny on Jan 15, 2012 17:24:28 GMT -5
Busier than a whipoorwills ass in fly time.
|
|
|
Post by ozark on Jan 15, 2012 18:14:44 GMT -5
She acts like someone has licked all the red off her sucker.
|
|
|
Post by smokepoler on Jan 15, 2012 20:39:28 GMT -5
He's running on a lean mixture. Cheese fell off his cracker a long time ago. Ain't playin' with a full deck. Fives & nines are missing. If S**t was brains, he'd be a genius.
my ol' man's favorite for a young buck's forgetfulness was "your memory ain't no longer than your pecker".
|
|
|
Post by Richard on Jan 15, 2012 20:45:49 GMT -5
She's hotter than a half F_ _ _ Fox in a forest fire!
|
|
|
Post by ozark on Jan 15, 2012 21:27:11 GMT -5
* That's as slick as snot on a door know * She's so skinny she has to run around in the shower to get wet! * Crooked as a dog's hind leg. * Crooked as a barrel of snakes. * Know how to tell he's lying? His mouth is moving. * She's as pretty as a speckled pup. * She's so skinny, if she turned sideways and stuck out her tongue, she'd look like a zipper. * It's as cold as a well-digger's A** * It's as hot as two sheep mating in a pepper patch. (referring to sense of direction) She needs a GPS to go to the bathroom.
|
|